Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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