okay pat passed out under dana's car
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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