Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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