Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
