i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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