So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
