i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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