does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Randomize
