...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
