That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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