i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
