literally had 100 drinks last night.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
