I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
