you traded sex for a burrito?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
