i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
