does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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