3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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