Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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