the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
