Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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