ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
