i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Randomize
