ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize