Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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