This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I have post one night stand depression
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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