this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
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