Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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