He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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