butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
