just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Randomize