You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
