Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
