Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize