I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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