I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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