you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
