so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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