so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
