Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
