shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
pop tarts are not kleenex
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
