Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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