so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
