I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Randomize
