what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
