You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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