Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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