This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
