woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
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