i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
