You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
