Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
