question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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