So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
